General Discussion Joke Thread

[StivnQ]

The next jokes are probably funnier in my language, but let me try  


1) Have you guys ever read a book called ''A dry t-shirt at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean''?

2) I'll try to translate this one.........dark humor.....incoming.....

''Two bald guys without their hands are trying to rip out their hair''


I repeat, both of those jokes were ideal when I was a kid, like 1990s 
And translate them to my language, you will probably have the first jokes I have ever heard.

[hssc11045]

A guy goes up to a girl in a bar and says, "You want to play 'Magic'?" She says, "What's that?" He says, "We go to my house and fuck, and then you disappear."

[DA]

A guy goes up to a girl in a bar and says, "You want to play 'Magic'?" She says, "What's that?" He says, "We go to my house and fuck, and then you disappear."

[fishdude123]

I'm terrible at jokes, but I love them!
I have a friend who one time while drunk at the bar yells, Do you know how to make a woman cum?  He waited and it got pretty quiet.  "who cares!" was what he then yelled.  He went home alone that night!

[hssc11045]

Why did the Walrus go to the Tupperware party??


So he could get a tight seal.................

[hssc11045]

Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mum only carries one photo, because once you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal!

[DA]

Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mum only carries one photo, because once you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal!

[metronom]

What is an astronaut's favourite part of a computer ?

THE SPACE BAR  

[hssc11045]

I had eczema, diarrhoea and haemorrhoids over the weekend...

My best game of Scrabble ever........


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Karl Marx is a historical figure and well known philosopher from the 19th century.
But nobody ever mentions his poor sister “Onya”


Who invented the starting pistol........



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This morning I went into the kitchen to see my wife boiling eggs on the cooker.


She said to me, "Make love to me right, here right now!"



I said, "Can't resist me, eh?"


She said, "No, the egg timer's broken!"

[DA]

loved the last one.