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[General Discussion] Joke Thread

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#51

Please don't spam my inbox, if i'm not replying, i'm not online and i haven't read your pm. Thanks a lot for understanding.
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#52
And so the Lord said unto John, "Come forth; and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.


I lost my watch at a party last night. An hour later, I saw some guy stepping on it while sexually harassing a woman.
Infuriated, I immediately went over, punched him and broke his nose.
No-one does that to a woman.

Not on my watch.


Finally found a way to stop the wife from sucking her thumb. 

I drew a cock on it.
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#53

Please don't spam my inbox, if i'm not replying, i'm not online and i haven't read your pm. Thanks a lot for understanding.
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#54
To the person who stole my anti-depressants. 

I hope you’re happy now.

got my first gamblers anonymous meeting today


it starts at 10 to 1

Yesterday a feminist asked me how I view lesbian relationships? 


Apparently 'In HD' wasn't the answer she was looking for! 
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#55
(10-09-2018, 01:52 AM)hssc11045 Wrote: To the person who stole my anti-depressants. 

I hope you’re happy now.

got my first gamblers anonymous meeting today


it starts at 10 to 1

Yesterday a feminist asked me how I view lesbian relationships? 


Apparently 'In HD' wasn't the answer she was looking for! 
i like the last one....

Please don't spam my inbox, if i'm not replying, i'm not online and i haven't read your pm. Thanks a lot for understanding.
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#56
(10-09-2018, 09:56 AM)DA Wrote:
(10-09-2018, 01:52 AM)hssc11045 Wrote: To the person who stole my anti-depressants. 

I hope you’re happy now.

got my first gamblers anonymous meeting today


it starts at 10 to 1

Yesterday a feminist asked me how I view lesbian relationships? 


Apparently 'In HD' wasn't the answer she was looking for! 
i like the last one....

At least she knows what is HD. Imagine if you answered to her "in 4K"
Please read forum rules carefully before making your first posts.
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#57
Teacher: "Anyone who thinks he's stupid may stand up!"
*Nobody stands up*
Teacher: "I’m sure there are some stupid students over here!!"
*Little Johnny stands up*
Teacher: "Ohh, Johnny you think you're stupid?"
Little Johnny: "No… I just feel bad that you're standing alone…"

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#58
(20-09-2018, 01:43 PM)twizted1975 Wrote: Teacher: "Anyone who thinks he's stupid may stand up!"
*Nobody stands up*
Teacher: "I’m sure there are some stupid students over here!!"
*Little Johnny stands up*
Teacher: "Ohh, Johnny you think you're stupid?"
Little Johnny: "No… I just feel bad that you're standing alone…"


nice...

Please don't spam my inbox, if i'm not replying, i'm not online and i haven't read your pm. Thanks a lot for understanding.
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#59
A sobbing Ms Murphy approaches Fr O’Grady after mass.
He says: “So what’s bothering you?”
She replies: “Oh, Father, I’ve terrible news. My husband passed away last night.”
The priest says: “Oh, Mary, that’s terrible. Did he have any last requests?”
"Certainly father," she replied. “He said: “Please Mary, put down that damn gun.”

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#60
nice one too..

Please don't spam my inbox, if i'm not replying, i'm not online and i haven't read your pm. Thanks a lot for understanding.
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